Hey. I was doing just fine just before I met you.
These words, as you may have noticed, are not my own. But don’t let that discourage you from reading this. Okay, yeah, I know what you’re thinking. Gillian, why are you quoting an extremely catchy song by The Chainsmokers in the first post of your sub-par blog? Another question you might have is, Gillian, why are you even making a blog in the first place? Is your life really that interesting that it merits a website dedicated to talking about the insignificant events that occur in it?
To answer your question, and approximately the half dozen more you are probably thinking of, I’ve taken the liberty of coming up with a list of FAQs, and their respective answers, that might clear things up a bit:
- Why are you quoting an extremely catchy song by The Chainsmokers in the first post of your sub-par blog?
- The truth is I’ve had this song stuck in my head for the past 4 days, and it doesn’t seem to be leaving any time soon. I may or may not be listening to it as I write this.
- Why are you even making a blog in the first place? Is your life really that interesting that it merits a website dedicated to talking about the insignificant events that occur in it?
- I always wanted a blog. Or at least some sort of outlet that allows me to write about my thoughts and/or feelings as they come, in some sort of format that is appropriate to be viewed by the public eye. So yes, is it mostly for me? Yes. Yes, it is. But I’m a giver, and I hope people find some entertainment in it. And by people, I mean you, Mom. Thanks for everything. You’re the real MVP.
- My life is actually pretty uninteresting. Sorry to disappoint. But, in the grand scheme of things, it’s about taking what you’re given and making the most of it. So I’m going to take what I have and try to spin it off as something really fantastic. Wish me luck.
- Apparently you’re a college student, but you keep ending some of your subordinate clauses with prepositions. Maybe you should quit thinking about enrolling in a graduate school and start thinking about enrolling in a fourth-grade English class.
- This isn’t a question, and I don’t know whether to be offended or impressed by your audacity. Yes, I keep ending sentences with prepositions, and I’m sorry about that. I might as well apologize in advance because the grammar in this blog post, and all future ones, may leave a lot to be desired. Not necessarily because they’ll be filled with inappropriately placed commas, but because I’ll be writing this in a simplistic format that’s supposed to mirror the structure of somebody talking. You don’t have to listen if you don’t want to (see? I did it again), but I promise this won’t be a complete waste of your time.
- What does the title of your blog mean, anyway? Are you trying to be funny?
- So my name is spelled Gillian, like Gillian Anderson, who is apparently an actress from a TV show my parents like a lot. You would not believe how many times people have tried to pronounce it with a hard G (instead of a soft one), similar to the namesake of an island from another popular TV show. I guess I figured I would get it off my chest from the get-go…my name is pronounced like “Jillian,” not “Gilligan.” I know. It takes a little getting used to. It took me almost 20 years to get it right.
- No, I’m not trying to be funny, but I do think it’s an accurate name for my blog, as it makes a reference to Gilligan’s Island (see bullet point above), and also because I’m from Long Island. If you don’t know about Long Island, it’s the fish-shaped chunk of land surrounded by water to the right of Manhattan, New York. It’s pretty much the best place on Earth and where I call home.
- What does the title of your blog post mean, anyway? Are you still trying to be funny?
- Okay, I was trying to be funny here, I admit that. I know I may not have succeeded, but at least, like I promised, I didn’t include the words “new beginnings” or “fresh start.” No, using those in quotes here doesn’t count.
- So, why should I care about this again?
- That is an excellent question, and I’m not sure I have an answer to that. You shouldn’t care about this at all, considering you probably have a social life (unlike yours truly) and the motivation to work hard most of the time (also unlike yours truly, who is currently writing this to avoid watching a movie for her Italian class). But I promise, there is an above-average probability that you’ll derive at least a few units of utility from reading this.
I hope that addressed the basics. If it didn’t, well, I’m sure they’ll be addressed eventually.